When I was in middle school this girl, Cricket was always talking about her "boyfriend from Canada"
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@futurebird
"Listen, before we get married, there's one thing you have to do for me.""Of course, name it."
"You need to legally change your name to Kyle and memorize this entire backstory."
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When I was in middle school this girl, Cricket was always talking about her "boyfriend from Canada"
"He's named Kyle and plays hockey. We met on the postcard exchange. He sent me this valentines day card."
We made fun of her. Kyle was obviously fake.
Well. She just married Kyle.
KYLE WAS REAL ALL ALONG.
@futurebird I went to grad school in Kentucky for reasons
where "girlfriend in Ohio" was the same fakeness as "girlfriend in Canada" is up here
i can also confirm my "girlfriend in Ohio" was real but wow did we not get married and DOUBLE-wow did I dodge a bullet
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@futurebird I went to grad school in Kentucky for reasons
where "girlfriend in Ohio" was the same fakeness as "girlfriend in Canada" is up here
i can also confirm my "girlfriend in Ohio" was real but wow did we not get married and DOUBLE-wow did I dodge a bullet
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When I was in middle school this girl, Cricket was always talking about her "boyfriend from Canada"
"He's named Kyle and plays hockey. We met on the postcard exchange. He sent me this valentines day card."
We made fun of her. Kyle was obviously fake.
Well. She just married Kyle.
KYLE WAS REAL ALL ALONG.
@futurebird I'm imagining single people in Canada suddenly deluged with propositions from people from the US who they haven't seen for years, or perhaps never even met in real life.
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Kyle was like bigfoot. Whenever we were supposed to get to meet him something would happen.
I really doubted he existed at all.
But I know someone who went to the wedding and laid a hand on Kyle. He's real.
i was just about to marry my Canadian girlfriend today then Kyle showed up and professed his love to my girlfriend right in the middle of the ceremony
and i couldn't believe it, she turned and looked at me, i will never forget that look, then she abandoned me for Kyle
Cricket and I are halfway through a bottle of cheap liquor right now
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When I was in middle school this girl, Cricket was always talking about her "boyfriend from Canada"
"He's named Kyle and plays hockey. We met on the postcard exchange. He sent me this valentines day card."
We made fun of her. Kyle was obviously fake.
Well. She just married Kyle.
KYLE WAS REAL ALL ALONG.
So is Canada.
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@futurebird As a Brit, the thing I’m most sceptical about is that someone might be called “Cricket”.
@TheVoidTLMB @futurebird there was a soap opera character named Cricket and sometimes those names get popular. There are way more Vanessas than Crickets, though.
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@futurebird I play hockey with Kyle all the time.
Did he ever walk down a long lonesome road and meet a demon?
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@PizzaDemon @futurebird No, 70% are named Dave so the numbers wouldn't add up if 40% were Kyle.
@smithkm @PizzaDemon @futurebird
Dave's not here, man.🤪
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@futurebird but aren't like 40% of Canadian men named Kyle? How do we know it's the same one? Could be a dream made real.
@PizzaDemon @futurebird if he's punched a hole in the drywall at some point he's probably named Kyle. Otherwise probably not.
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@PizzaDemon @futurebird No, 70% are named Dave so the numbers wouldn't add up if 40% were Kyle.
@smithkm @PizzaDemon @futurebird
Can confirm
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