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  3. I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

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  • sashin@veganism.socialS sashin@veganism.social

    @vkc How would you feel about sharing the really bad stuff too but with clear content warnings?

    vkc@linuxmom.netV This user is from outside of this forum
    vkc@linuxmom.netV This user is from outside of this forum
    vkc@linuxmom.net
    schrieb zuletzt editiert von
    #25

    @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

    sashin@veganism.socialS bredroll@mas.toB toadjaune@hostux.socialT 3 Antworten Letzte Antwort
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    • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

      @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

      sashin@veganism.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
      sashin@veganism.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
      sashin@veganism.social
      schrieb zuletzt editiert von
      #26

      @vkc I'm sorry you have to go through that.

      1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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      • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

        What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

        I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

        shadowwwind@fosstodon.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
        shadowwwind@fosstodon.orgS This user is from outside of this forum
        shadowwwind@fosstodon.org
        schrieb zuletzt editiert von
        #27

        @vkc hey, thank you for posting here, I rediscovered your channel because of your Mastodon posts.

        For me the moderation is a big reason to be on a managed instance

        Question I had but reading your other comments suggests the answer ;D :
        One thing I wondered, did your mastodon experience change when you moved from a moderated instance to your own?

        1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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        • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

          @McNeely I think it's unique to decentralization. If your instance blocked a baddie before they post in my replies, you don't see it and I do. In centralized social media, a mass of reports is enough to ban an account and get their posts mass-deleted. That just can't happen here.

          void@social.voidkvlt.euV This user is from outside of this forum
          void@social.voidkvlt.euV This user is from outside of this forum
          void@social.voidkvlt.eu
          schrieb zuletzt editiert von
          #28

          @vkc @McNeely 100% accurate. I run a micro-instance that's likely to upset people and attract bother, and I have to set aside time to expose myself to some genuinely grotesque and upsetting stuff in order to keep on top of the servers I need to block, and we get far fewer eyeballs and interaction on us than Victoria.

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          • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

            What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

            I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

            moerje@piaille.frM This user is from outside of this forum
            moerje@piaille.frM This user is from outside of this forum
            moerje@piaille.fr
            schrieb zuletzt editiert von
            #29

            @vkc sorry about all that crap. Some people are using their anonymity to reveal their real nature that can be awful. And because they may read you every day, they think they know you intimately so they suppose they're allowed to tell you anything they want. That's difficult to ignore these haters when you're their target. I hope you'll be able to get over it.

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            • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

              I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

              It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

              I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

              Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

              claus@hachyderm.ioC This user is from outside of this forum
              claus@hachyderm.ioC This user is from outside of this forum
              claus@hachyderm.io
              schrieb zuletzt editiert von
              #30

              @vkc I'm sorry about how Fedi is treating you. I sometimes forget that my own Fedi bubble is benign not because Fedi as a whole is benign, but because I put in the effort to aggressively block any content I don't like, *and* I don't have a visible enough presence that would encourage the undesirables to circumvent my block list.

              Social media can be garbage, and if you do need a break I will be sad because I enjoy your content, but please do put your own mental health first if you need to.

              Best wishes...

              1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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              • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                threedollarchickenparm@mstdn.caT This user is from outside of this forum
                threedollarchickenparm@mstdn.caT This user is from outside of this forum
                threedollarchickenparm@mstdn.ca
                schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                #31

                @vkc Thanks for speaking openly about this, Veronica. I cannot fully understand your situation, but I can relate to being harassed in an invisible way and I wouldn't wish that on anyone else. I wouldn't want to see you leave Fedi, but I also wouldn't blame you if you did.

                1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                  When people say "Veronica loves the Fediverse", they remove my agency from this place. I'm a character. They're the narrator. I don't like that.

                  I think for a lot of folks, Fedi is sweet. It's quiet. It's slow. But for many, many, many of us, it's this slow-rolling insanity machine where you see the WORST THINGS and nobody else does.

                  And to be frank and clear, I'm just talking about things from my white US perspective. I don't even get the worst of it, and I recognize that.

                  dlaroe@fosstodon.orgD This user is from outside of this forum
                  dlaroe@fosstodon.orgD This user is from outside of this forum
                  dlaroe@fosstodon.org
                  schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                  #32

                  @vkc

                  You are surely frank and clear.

                  You sharing stuff like this is really valuable to me as a white, cisgendered, heterosexual, male, with a low volume account. My privileges stack in such a way that I see none of the bad actor interactions you do.

                  Thank you for sharing what those who aren't even the worst of us in the Fediverse are doing so we all can know at least that much.

                  1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                  • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                    @McNeely I think it's unique to decentralization. If your instance blocked a baddie before they post in my replies, you don't see it and I do. In centralized social media, a mass of reports is enough to ban an account and get their posts mass-deleted. That just can't happen here.

                    shadow_glider@equestria.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                    shadow_glider@equestria.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                    shadow_glider@equestria.social
                    schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                    #33

                    @vkc @McNeely Perhaps reports could be federated and an instance can set it so that if an account has over a certain amount of reports posts/replies have to be manually approved?

                    Not sure how much this would help but it feels like it could help somewhat, obvs if this is a bad idea please tell me

                    bredroll@mas.toB 1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                    • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                      I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                      It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                      I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                      Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                      classwario@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                      classwario@mastodon.socialC This user is from outside of this forum
                      classwario@mastodon.social
                      schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                      #34

                      @vkc This platform needs more editing (and anger) aimed at it. This is my third account because I get frustrated at what it is (then come back here for what it should be).

                      1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                      • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                        @sashin I get things that are illegal if I retransmit them

                        bredroll@mas.toB This user is from outside of this forum
                        bredroll@mas.toB This user is from outside of this forum
                        bredroll@mas.to
                        schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                        #35

                        @vkc @sashin i wonder if fedi has a community block list feature

                        1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                        • shadow_glider@equestria.socialS shadow_glider@equestria.social

                          @vkc @McNeely Perhaps reports could be federated and an instance can set it so that if an account has over a certain amount of reports posts/replies have to be manually approved?

                          Not sure how much this would help but it feels like it could help somewhat, obvs if this is a bad idea please tell me

                          bredroll@mas.toB This user is from outside of this forum
                          bredroll@mas.toB This user is from outside of this forum
                          bredroll@mas.to
                          schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                          #36

                          @Shadow_Glider @vkc @McNeely i do wonder if its more costly to manage federated or honepot blocking than the bad actors just creating more accounts

                          1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                          • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                            I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                            It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                            I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                            Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                            borisschapira@framapiaf.orgB This user is from outside of this forum
                            borisschapira@framapiaf.orgB This user is from outside of this forum
                            borisschapira@framapiaf.org
                            schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                            #37

                            @vkc sorry you have to got through this. Did you notice the content to the server's admin (really asking, not saying you have to)?

                            1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                            • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                              What I've shared today is just *annoying*. It isn't the level of malevolence that I've seen.

                              I've had stuff sent my way that I have nightmares about. I won't share that crap. But annoying stuff? I'm not holding that back anymore- you-all are getting called out.

                              osma@mas.toO This user is from outside of this forum
                              osma@mas.toO This user is from outside of this forum
                              osma@mas.to
                              schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                              #38

                              Thanks for being here, and thanks for speaking out. This won't ever get better without first acknowledging it's not good.
                              @vkc

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                              • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                                @McNeely I think it's unique to decentralization. If your instance blocked a baddie before they post in my replies, you don't see it and I do. In centralized social media, a mass of reports is enough to ban an account and get their posts mass-deleted. That just can't happen here.

                                furby@towns.gayF This user is from outside of this forum
                                furby@towns.gayF This user is from outside of this forum
                                furby@towns.gay
                                schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                                #39

                                @vkc @McNeely This highlights a need for more co-ordinated efforts like The Bad Space, but less manual. @Gargron How are those imported ban lists coming along?

                                1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                                • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                                  I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                  It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                  I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                  Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                  hobo_ahoi@mastodon.socialH This user is from outside of this forum
                                  hobo_ahoi@mastodon.socialH This user is from outside of this forum
                                  hobo_ahoi@mastodon.social
                                  schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                                  #40

                                  @vkc I really appreciate your work here (as well as on YouTube), and I am glad that people like you contribute the Fediverse. Recently in German Mastodon another woman issued hate speech she is receiving on a regular basis. It‘s a shame, and it‘s simply against everything the Fediverse was built for. Please feel my/our support!

                                  PS: And I apologize for my remark earlier today, which I made while not having understood well the things you were talking about.

                                  1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                                  • francis@mastodon.babb.noF francis@mastodon.babb.no

                                    @vkc You're great, Veronica, and I do appreciate your work.

                                    eivind@mastodon.fjerland.noE This user is from outside of this forum
                                    eivind@mastodon.fjerland.noE This user is from outside of this forum
                                    eivind@mastodon.fjerland.no
                                    schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                                    #41

                                    @francis @vkc I concur. I'm sorry to hear you've had bad experiences here, and I have benefited from your knowledge more than once. And to those making people's lives difficult here, just cut it out.

                                    1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                                    • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                                      I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                      It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                      I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                      Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                      nthelt@mastodon.socialN This user is from outside of this forum
                                      nthelt@mastodon.socialN This user is from outside of this forum
                                      nthelt@mastodon.social
                                      schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                                      #42

                                      @vkc I appreciate you. You're welcome here.

                                      I feel that moderation tools on Fedi is lacking. There should be a way for smaller instances to follow the moderation decisions of larger, more well-moderated instances. Maybe in the form of a community blocked users and instances list that updates in real time, and instances can choose to follow that 100%, or apply whitelists and blacklists to it.

                                      Maybe multiple block lists, like we do with ad blocking.

                                      kelson@notes.kvibber.comK 1 Antwort Letzte Antwort
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                                      • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                                        I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                        It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                        I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                        Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                        missconstrue@mefi.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                        missconstrue@mefi.socialM This user is from outside of this forum
                                        missconstrue@mefi.social
                                        schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                                        #43

                                        @vkc Im sorry you are experiencing this. Being ovarian presenting and conscious has always been problematic for a certain subset of humans to recognize. How very dare we be autonomous. 🫂

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                                        • vkc@linuxmom.netV vkc@linuxmom.net

                                          I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.

                                          It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.

                                          I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.

                                          Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.

                                          scunneen@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                          scunneen@mastodon.socialS This user is from outside of this forum
                                          scunneen@mastodon.social
                                          schrieb zuletzt editiert von
                                          #44

                                          @vkc Do you think that things would be better if fedi worked more like a network of blogs and stored comments on the server of the person who made the original post? Then deciding which comments people see is the responsibility of the original post's server, and everyone can see the same comment list. This also would allow posters to delete other peoples' comments on their posts, and to prevent people who they have blocked from commenting.

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