Student loans, you got me through college. I don't think I can ever repay you.

A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica, $2.75 in Aruba, and $3.00 in the Bahamas.

Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

What's the difference between a vampire and a smoker at a narcoleptic convention?
One sleeps in a coffin, and the other coughs at a sleep-in!

My friends and I are in a band called Duvet.
We're a cover band.