Kinda galling talking to my brother and realising he's already written his own son off due to his gender.
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eleven years later, and i'm still learning new things about myself in both practice and in form: curvature i didn't have, new habits granted from regular affirmation of my transness. i've recently begun to actually dig into being in a larger trans community locally, and that's brought tons of solace and grace and comraderie too. the individualist sociocultural dynamic of living more north in the US left its trans spaces a little clique-oriented, and as a socially-atrophied trans lady, fitting into those spaces of trans people that have lived their entire lives in society was difficult but altogether okay. but moving to the south has taught me that trans people here collectivize and have a shared understanding of interconnectedness that is pretty amazing.
i guess some of this is a ramble about my surroundings (been on a weird kick of wanting to feel more grounded to the world under my feet than the one in my head), but i guess it also is an observation that environment has tons to do with how you respond to your hormonal treatment, and that no one roadmap is the only path on that route to transness.

side note: after i got on blockers i kept a pretty consistent bi-weekly journal.
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eleven years later, and i'm still learning new things about myself in both practice and in form: curvature i didn't have, new habits granted from regular affirmation of my transness. i've recently begun to actually dig into being in a larger trans community locally, and that's brought tons of solace and grace and comraderie too. the individualist sociocultural dynamic of living more north in the US left its trans spaces a little clique-oriented, and as a socially-atrophied trans lady, fitting into those spaces of trans people that have lived their entire lives in society was difficult but altogether okay. but moving to the south has taught me that trans people here collectivize and have a shared understanding of interconnectedness that is pretty amazing.
i guess some of this is a ramble about my surroundings (been on a weird kick of wanting to feel more grounded to the world under my feet than the one in my head), but i guess it also is an observation that environment has tons to do with how you respond to your hormonal treatment, and that no one roadmap is the only path on that route to transness.

@bedhead oh yes, I'm very much contemplating the same things; the larger social contexts in which we live, how all our identities are ultimately in relation to the communities we situate ourselves within.
I like to say my transition happened from the inside out; from my body to my presentation to my environment to my relationships to my role within society. But maybe I'm describing there what fell within my awareness, and subconsciously it has always been a holistic project.
@valentine -
@log it's such a tough one, isn't it? Because as well as the realities of child-rearing, kids do need to start socialising with their peers at some point. There's no easy answers to societal problems.
@Bel_tamtu@Tattie @Bel_tamtu Especially when societal problems can beget further societal problems, in a spiral that cycles vicious one way, and virtuous the other. The departure from Bowley's Law circa 1980 has hollowed out the working class, and its children paid a price. Now the grandchildren are paying the same price and more.
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@Colman @Tattie My parents raised me and my siblings pretty gender neutrally. I think there's a decent chance they would have done that even if I hadn't been nonbinary. I'm not even sure how much of that was because I was nonbinary. It doesn't help that nonbinary wasn't a concept any of us had then.
@BernieDoesIt @Tattie I don't think any parents in my extended family would have understood the discussion in the 1970s.
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@Tattie @Bel_tamtu Especially when societal problems can beget further societal problems, in a spiral that cycles vicious one way, and virtuous the other. The departure from Bowley's Law circa 1980 has hollowed out the working class, and its children paid a price. Now the grandchildren are paying the same price and more.
@log Googles
Learns
@Bel_tamtu -
@BernieDoesIt @Tattie I don't think any parents in my extended family would have understood the discussion in the 1970s.
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@Colman @Tattie It turns out that people judge your gender compliance a lot by what clothes you wear, and coding what clothes you wore by what genitals you had was one of the few parts of gender that made sense to me as a little kid. That conviction started to fade by the time I was a teenager, but I still kept wearing the same clothes out of inertia and some understanding that it kept me safe.
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