*sigh* marketing director.
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*sigh* marketing director. Hey can we schedule an accessibility review?
Me. Looks at their website, sees they have a very inaccessible shirt design process.
Me. I am so sorry, but I will be unable to do this accessibility review, but here are some developers that can both code for accessibility and test for accessibility too.
Gives 20 web accessibility developers. Explains in multiple paragraphs why the site is inaccessible. Sends a full report, including blog post links by experts better than me, backing up everything I said and then some.
Marketing director. But they provide more than what we asked for, we just want a video overview of the website with a screen talker.
Me. Fine.
*does the meeting. It comes out to the exact thing I said in the email. That this cannot be fixed unless some deep code making is under way*
Marketing manager. But how do we make it accessible? We don't wanna get sued by blind people. You can't make a website 100% accessible.
Me. Sends an exact copy of the email I sent previously, with more than 10 links to accessibility developers.
Marketing director. But I see nothing on their website about protecting businesses from lawsuits by blind people. Where are the lawsuit protections.
Me. I. Fucking. Hate. Accessibility!
@WeirdWriter there is a new law coming into effect in my local area where all school communication needs to be accessible...my friend works in the student accessibility department and her boss has been beating the drum trying to get the school district to comply...their answer: set aside money for inevitable lawsuit
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@WeirdWriter there is a new law coming into effect in my local area where all school communication needs to be accessible...my friend works in the student accessibility department and her boss has been beating the drum trying to get the school district to comply...their answer: set aside money for inevitable lawsuit
@cinderdazzle612 Honestly? I thought about joining these plaintiffs multiple times, because I can’t tell you how many business people just don’t even try to understand
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@cinderdazzle612 Honestly? I thought about joining these plaintiffs multiple times, because I can’t tell you how many business people just don’t even try to understand
@WeirdWriter sometimes seems the court is only way which is frustrating!
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*sigh* marketing director. Hey can we schedule an accessibility review?
Me. Looks at their website, sees they have a very inaccessible shirt design process.
Me. I am so sorry, but I will be unable to do this accessibility review, but here are some developers that can both code for accessibility and test for accessibility too.
Gives 20 web accessibility developers. Explains in multiple paragraphs why the site is inaccessible. Sends a full report, including blog post links by experts better than me, backing up everything I said and then some.
Marketing director. But they provide more than what we asked for, we just want a video overview of the website with a screen talker.
Me. Fine.
*does the meeting. It comes out to the exact thing I said in the email. That this cannot be fixed unless some deep code making is under way*
Marketing manager. But how do we make it accessible? We don't wanna get sued by blind people. You can't make a website 100% accessible.
Me. Sends an exact copy of the email I sent previously, with more than 10 links to accessibility developers.
Marketing director. But I see nothing on their website about protecting businesses from lawsuits by blind people. Where are the lawsuit protections.
Me. I. Fucking. Hate. Accessibility!
95% of consulting is dressing things, putting sugar around the medicine so the client swallows it. I'm willing to offer my services as an engineering-to-business-major translator. My job will be sitting between you and the client so neither of you has to deal with each other.

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*sigh* marketing director. Hey can we schedule an accessibility review?
Me. Looks at their website, sees they have a very inaccessible shirt design process.
Me. I am so sorry, but I will be unable to do this accessibility review, but here are some developers that can both code for accessibility and test for accessibility too.
Gives 20 web accessibility developers. Explains in multiple paragraphs why the site is inaccessible. Sends a full report, including blog post links by experts better than me, backing up everything I said and then some.
Marketing director. But they provide more than what we asked for, we just want a video overview of the website with a screen talker.
Me. Fine.
*does the meeting. It comes out to the exact thing I said in the email. That this cannot be fixed unless some deep code making is under way*
Marketing manager. But how do we make it accessible? We don't wanna get sued by blind people. You can't make a website 100% accessible.
Me. Sends an exact copy of the email I sent previously, with more than 10 links to accessibility developers.
Marketing director. But I see nothing on their website about protecting businesses from lawsuits by blind people. Where are the lawsuit protections.
Me. I. Fucking. Hate. Accessibility!
@WeirdWriter I‘m feeling you! I had so many conversations in the last ten years about why „things can’t be accessible for everyone“, why „disabled people don’t do this“ or why „accessibility is just expensive and doesnt help at all“.
Most recent additions by coworkers: „accessibility is just annoying me“ and „I wish I could simply ignore accessibility“ and „I don’t care about it at all“.
Lovely
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*sigh* marketing director. Hey can we schedule an accessibility review?
Me. Looks at their website, sees they have a very inaccessible shirt design process.
Me. I am so sorry, but I will be unable to do this accessibility review, but here are some developers that can both code for accessibility and test for accessibility too.
Gives 20 web accessibility developers. Explains in multiple paragraphs why the site is inaccessible. Sends a full report, including blog post links by experts better than me, backing up everything I said and then some.
Marketing director. But they provide more than what we asked for, we just want a video overview of the website with a screen talker.
Me. Fine.
*does the meeting. It comes out to the exact thing I said in the email. That this cannot be fixed unless some deep code making is under way*
Marketing manager. But how do we make it accessible? We don't wanna get sued by blind people. You can't make a website 100% accessible.
Me. Sends an exact copy of the email I sent previously, with more than 10 links to accessibility developers.
Marketing director. But I see nothing on their website about protecting businesses from lawsuits by blind people. Where are the lawsuit protections.
Me. I. Fucking. Hate. Accessibility!
@WeirdWriter i facepalmed so hard
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@WeirdWriter there is a new law coming into effect in my local area where all school communication needs to be accessible...my friend works in the student accessibility department and her boss has been beating the drum trying to get the school district to comply...their answer: set aside money for inevitable lawsuit
Why not just, I don't know, FIX THE THING?
Can't possibly be more expensive than lawsuits, can it??
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*sigh* marketing director. Hey can we schedule an accessibility review?
Me. Looks at their website, sees they have a very inaccessible shirt design process.
Me. I am so sorry, but I will be unable to do this accessibility review, but here are some developers that can both code for accessibility and test for accessibility too.
Gives 20 web accessibility developers. Explains in multiple paragraphs why the site is inaccessible. Sends a full report, including blog post links by experts better than me, backing up everything I said and then some.
Marketing director. But they provide more than what we asked for, we just want a video overview of the website with a screen talker.
Me. Fine.
*does the meeting. It comes out to the exact thing I said in the email. That this cannot be fixed unless some deep code making is under way*
Marketing manager. But how do we make it accessible? We don't wanna get sued by blind people. You can't make a website 100% accessible.
Me. Sends an exact copy of the email I sent previously, with more than 10 links to accessibility developers.
Marketing director. But I see nothing on their website about protecting businesses from lawsuits by blind people. Where are the lawsuit protections.
Me. I. Fucking. Hate. Accessibility!
@WeirdWriter Ugg this sounds awful. Thank you for reminding me why I don't do accessibility work.
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@WeirdWriter i facepalmed so hard
@NicMakesStuff It’s especially funny because you were one of my recommendations! If they contact you, I’m sorry ahead of time. They use a CMS with an AccessiBe overlay despite my objections. I don’t know what CMS they were using but it looked like Shopify
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Why not just, I don't know, FIX THE THING?
Can't possibly be more expensive than lawsuits, can it??
@violetmadder @cinderdazzle612 I know right? I will never understand these business people, at all.
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